Conversion (is not) Therapy
A love letter to neurodivergent queer folks.
At the end of March, the supreme court opened a door to mental health professionals providing conversion therapy to clients. The appalling ruling was made due to a Christian counselor claiming that her rights were violated, and the first amendment right to free speech was invoked as the basis for the ruling. Now I’m not an attorney, but I am a queer therapist. States regulate what I can and can’t do all of the time. The treatment I provide as a therapist is in no small part, the words I say. This idea that therapy constitutes free speech is a gross misunderstanding of therapy and is only being used to cause harm.
Conversion therapy does not help. It is often traumatic to queer kids and adults alike. This is not an over exaggeration. It’s an insidious solution looking for a problem. Being queer, whether you’re gay, lesbian, bi, trans, asexual, something in between is not a problem. There is no distress directly caused by being queer. Queerness itself can be exciting, liberating, and in some ways, boring and normal. Diversity is a very human experience, and not to be pathologized. There is distress that results from systemic oppression, discrimination, and social ostracizing. It is a mistake to think that the distress is a result of being queer and not the oppressive systems themselves.
I’m worried about my neurodivergent community. Particularly because autistic folks are more likely than non autistic people to be queer. This makes a lot of sense if you know anything about autistic people. We are less likely to intuitively understand social norms, and normative gender and sexuality are social constructs. If we don’t naturally internalize the performance of gender, why would we not be our true selves? Autistic people are also likely to have difficulties that push them into mental healthcare settings. Beyond all of the other ways the current regime is targeting autistic people, this recent ruling is just another push toward conformity and control.
It has already been the case that autistic people have been denied gender-affirming care due to their autism diagnosis. The supposed reasoning being that they aren’t able to provide informed consent for this medical care. Having a disability such as autism already leads professionals to make assumptions about your competency and limit your self-determination. What will this ruling lead to, if not a greater push toward trying to convert the queerness out of autistic people who simply need support?
What I’m telling my neurodivergent and queer clients in the extraordinarily (for the U.S.) safe state of Oregon? Do not comply in advance. Vet your clinicians to make sure they are safe. Continue to get the care you need until you can’t. Don’t make assumptions based on what you hear on the news. Most of all, know that affirming care is life saving care. You deserve to be seen, heard, and treated as the person you truly are. I worry for you and with you, and I fully support you in making informed choices about what you need and when you need it. Colorado (a state at risk for changing laws about conversion therapy) has already begun to attempt other ways of strengthening protections since the Supreme Court decision.
To all my neurodivergent and queer friends in all states, I’m sending all my love and support your way. Stay informed, and do what you gotta do to stay safe.
